Whatever pronouns / 22/ Jewish / ADHD / Secretly a bird
There is no coherent theme to this blog.
I block for the most minor offenses. Mildly annoying comment? Blocked. Bad vibes? Blocked. This is not real life you can curate your experience :D
twitter limiting the amount of tweets you get to read per day is ridiculous but if tiktok limited the amount of videos people got to see per day it would be the biggest win for mental health since ssris
If Janet and Helena S. would get together. Cassie Tim Janet and Helena would be the most insufferable and weirdest archeology superheroes nerds family of all time. Like their dinner table topics would be truly insane and unbearable.
they invite the rest of Tim’s weird bat family people over for dinner once (yes janet knows that’s Bruce she maintains her statement) and Helena hits them with the “So what are your opinions on the iron trade and its ramifications on modern-day Western Europe?” and then she, Janet, Cassie and Tim have an extremely passionate argument about it for the rest of dinner. Bruce doesn’t accept dinner invites from them anymore.
Bruce is the only one that stops accepting dinner invites because he’s weak and nobody likes him. Everyone else adores the dinners because a) good food b) good company and c) Bruce isn’t there
Janet: Bruce declined our invite again
Dick, eating the best lasagna of his life: yeah I really can’t imagine why. Don’t ask him if he’s sure though he made his choice
Babs: so, Mrs. Helena, Mrs. Janet, what are your opinions on the sexist idea that men were hunters and women were gatherers despite recent and older evidence proving otherwise?
Cass, whispering to Tim and Cassie: is she…flirting with your moms?
Tim, mortified: I don’t know
Dick: no, she isn’t.
Dick: I hope.
Cassie: Cass, I love you, but I really don’t want to be your sister
Cass: me neither
Helena after the dinner, was utterly charmed but not romantically: we need to invite Barbara over more, don’t we dear?
Janet, felt the same: oh absolutely.
Tim, frantically calling Barbara: please stop coming to my house
Barbara, wasn’t flirting but knows how Everyone that wasn’t over thirty saw it: I don’t think I will.
this just leads to tim, Cassie, and Cass pulling the world’s most elaborate anti-Parent Trap ever
Cassie: we can’t both be Cassandra Sandsmark-Drake-Gordon what if one of us gets arrested because of something the other one did
Tim: that’s your first thought?
Cass: you will be arrested. I don’t get caught.
Cassie: Cissie this is an emergency we need your help :(
Cissie: what is it?
Tim: B- Oracle is flirting with our moms!
Cissie:
Cissie: and that’s a problem…why?
Cass: I don’t like it.
Cassie: I’ll get arrested for something Cass did, cause then we’d have the same name!
Cissie: I’m hanging up now, good luck.
Cassie: wait, Cissie, don’t- and she’s gone.
Tim:
Tim: hey, Dick-
Dick: me? Stop babs? You’re very funny
Tim: pleaseeeeee dick
Dick: listen I wish I could but alas
Dick: I don’t want babs to kick me out of my computer do you know how many hours I have on my Minecraft survival world I’m not losing that okay
Tim: …
Tim: mr. Gordon -
Commissioner Gordon: do we know each other?
Tim: I definitely know you, yes. See, your daughter, Barbara, is psychologically torturing me, my sister Cassie, and my sister Cass, and I would like you to make her stop.
Cassie: please.
Tim: please.
Gordon: I…Barbara is doing what?
Cass: useless. What about B?
Tim: worse idea, he’ll mess it up.
Cassie: I really don’t want to live like this.
Tim: I mean…there’s someone else we could try.
Dinah, picking up her phone at two am, groggy: hello?
Tim, behind her: hi—stop, ow, ow, it’s just me and wonder girl and batgirl, ow, stop it—listen, we need you to talk to Babs-
Cassie: what if. We got rid of babs
Tim: we can’t murder babs Cassie wtf
Cass: yeah cassie wtf
Cassie: I meant send her elsewhere. We have dinah’s number send them to a restaurant idk
Tim: like set them up???
Cassie: duh. See, this is why I plot with cissie and Anita. They don’t ask dumb questions
Babs: you do know the kids are setting us up, right?
Dinah: oh absolutely, they begged me to help. Your creepy little one even threatened me. It was endearing, sort of.
Babs: I could get them to back off.
Dinah: I never said I didn’t want to be here, Babs. Also they’re watching us over the cameras.
Babs: I’m aware. Hi kids.
Cass, turning to Tim and Cassie: I think we won.
babs is the real winner, she wasn’t even flirting with their moms and yet she still managed to leave the situation with a girlfriend 😭 wishing that was me and I had neighbours to flirt with so their kids and my sort of daughter could set me up with my hot teammate tbh
In conclusion, always rely on teenagers neutralizing each other’s braincells, it’ll never fail
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